Thursday 21 February 2013

Who are you?

Are you what other people think you are? or Are you what you want to be?
Growing up I have always been surrounded by a loving family and very nice friends (touchwood). I was always overweight and most of the people around me knew it bothered me...so they were always very protective...people would tell me I have a broad structure and that I'm not really fat, or they would blame it on genes, we all love food it's in the family...friends would call me cute and the worst thing that I have ever heard was I'm pleasantly plump...not fat or anywhere close to being overweight. (I was obese..)
I'm not saying any one of them was wrong for doing what they did, in their own way they were just avoiding me from being hurt but in the process I started using each of these as an excuse to continue eating junk food and not exercising. I changed myself, I believed I was broad so I would never be normal like my other friends...I never even tried to control my eating because I believed my love of food was in my genes and I could not change it. I wanted to be normal...but I thought that was not even a possibility so I did not give it a try, I felt that if I would have not believed this maybe...maybe I would have started earlier, maybe I would have done things differently...recently I discovered I fit in the petite size ;) so from broad frame to petite..(LOL)
Growing up because I was overweight it was difficult for me to enjoy sports just because I could not keep up...again everybody including friends were very sweet to me and nobody really pushed me. I always admired people who played sports and enjoyed running but I thought I was the stay at home type of person always believing I was not athletic and I hated running...now I actually enjoy working out, running and I still love reading. Everybody including me is surprised :) 
I think I made a big mistake by believing everything people said to me and using all that as an excuse not to change and get healthy...
Why not decide for yourself what you want to be instead of believing everything people say to you. Why  not decide what is right for you instead of blindly believing everything you hear. I'm not saying your friends or family want you to be unhealthy it might be their way of protecting you...but you have to decide what you want to believe...
Have you ever felt this way? Have you ever stopped yourself because the everybody around you thought differently?

Keep Reading I will Keep Writing 
Tanvee

9 comments:

  1. It's funny, because as I got heavier, I had the exact opposite reaction from those around me who loved me the most; pushing and prodding me to do something about my weight. But I believe in the old adage 'you can lead a horse to water but you can't make them drink.' A person isn't going to do anything about their excess weight until the time is right, in their own time, to do it. We all :: know :: that we are overweight. But each person as to reach the 'perfect time' / storm in their life before all the planets align and it's their own personal time to change it. Even then, we don't always get it right the first time.

    So while I understand what you are saying, and perhaps your family were 'enablers' for your obesity, even if they had been 180 degrees different, doesn't mean you would've started down the path to good health any sooner. Weird dichotomy, huh?

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  2. Hi Gwen,
    I never really thought about what I would do if I was constantly reminded of my weight either, maybe I would rebel and get heavier...
    Through this post I certainly don't want to blame my family or friends for my weight gain that was solely my responsibility :) but I just wish I would have not used all those things as a basis/ excuse to not try changing myself..
    (I'm going to add a little note in the end of the post, I don't want anybody thinking I'm blaming them for my bad habits...)

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  3. IT's ok to blame, at first. It's just a step on the journey. Don't change anything; you addressed it here in comments. I didn't mean to make you feel you had to change anything. Your feelings are your feelings! I was just showing an additional view, not a replacement one. :)

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    1. I'm still debating (I don't want anybody getting hurt because they think I blame them, but for now no changes :)

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  4. Hi Tanvee! I have a post, which I gave a speech about--entitled "Maybe They Were Wrong About You." I have felt this same sentiment, only the people in my life were a lot meaner about it. I guess it doesn't matter if the sentiment is mean or nice, it still obstructs a person's growth process. As usual, your blog is awesome, including this post. :D

    :-) Marion

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    1. Hi Marion,
      thank you for your encouragement. I just read your post I love what you say about giving yourself a chance..open mindedness is very important, I personally think all these weight loss things can apply to so many other aspects of life..(that will another post ;))

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  5. I loved your post and I understand your feelings. Try not to let others influence you (Not as easy as it sounds). The more you believe in yourself, the happier you will be. Happiness leads to healthiness!

    Betty

    http://agutandabutt.blogspot.com/

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    1. Thank you Betty, I think I have changed a lot during my weight loss journey and this was one of my biggest challenges...not letting others influence my decisions..I'm still not perfect but now I do work harder at recognizing my choices, believing in myself and making my own decisions :)

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  6. I feel like I have been in between two impossible situations - being told I was overweight/fat by family yet being fed as well. It really is about us deciding to take a stand for ourselves. Regardless of what people are saying around you, positive/negative/neutral, the change really won't come until we decide to make it. After that it's about sticking to our guns. Even now, when I go somewhere and I say, no, I don't want any bread or no to something fried, I get the whole - Why not? One won't hurt? You're already exercising so it doesn't matter.

    Not everyone gets it. Figuring out who you are really is important.

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